Defining a Better Relationship with Money

All the statistics show that money is one of the biggest sources of anxiety in modern life. Whether it’s the inability to save, the stress of overspending, or simply not knowing where our money goes each month — many of us feel out of control when it comes to our finances.

When I wrote Money and Meaning, I wanted to share my own journey with money — and I’ll be the first to admit, I’m far from perfect. Like many people, my relationship with money has been a rollercoaster of success, setbacks, and lessons learned.

But that’s the point. Money isn’t just about numbers; it’s about understanding your behaviour, your motivations, and the values behind your choices. The goal is to develop a healthier, more intentional relationship with money — one that reduces stress and increases confidence.

In this blog, I want to share one simple but powerful concept from the book: the SMART goals framework.

Turning Dreams into Direction

Let’s take a practical example.

Say you want to build an office in the garden, and it costs £20,000. You’d like to achieve this in two years.

That means saving roughly £850 a month.

On paper, that seems straightforward — but life rarely sticks to the plan. Unexpected costs arise, priorities shift, and self-doubt creeps in. Should you stretch your timeline? Borrow some of the money? Or give up altogether?

This uncertainty often stops progress before it starts. That’s where SMART goals come in.

SMART Goals Explained

SMART is a simple yet powerful tool for giving structure to your financial ambitions. It helps to turn vague wishes into achievable plans.

• S – Specific: Be crystal clear about what you want to achieve.
  Example: “Save £20,000 for a garden office.”

• M – Measurable: Know how you’ll track progress.
  Example: “Save £850 each month for 24 months.”

• A – Achievable: Check whether it’s realistic based on your income, spending, and priorities.
  If not, adjust the timeline or goal rather than abandoning it.

• R – Relevant: Ensure your goal aligns with your current values and lifestyle.
  Is this garden office a genuine priority, or are there other goals that matter more right now?

• T – Time-bound: Set a clear deadline.
  Example: “Reach the goal by December 2027.”

This approach transforms your goals from something abstract (“I’d like to save more”) into something tangible and motivating.

Why This Works

SMART goals work because they create clarity, focus, and accountability — three things that help reduce financial anxiety.

When you define your goals clearly, you shift your mindset from “I can’t” to “I’m working towards it.” That small change has a powerful psychological effect. According to research from the University of California, people who write down specific goals are 42% more likely to achieve them.

SMART isn’t a rigid formula — it’s a framework for progress with purpose. It helps ensure your financial goals serve you, rather than gathering dust on a wish list.

And most importantly, it encourages reflection — asking not just how you’ll achieve your goals, but why they matter in the first place.

A Healthier Relationship with Money